The University Boat Race
I’ve been meaning to get this out of my inbox for weeks.
Having worked in a university for years, I find it hugely relevant and it brings to mind all my interactions with well-meaning walking Peter Principles. Of course, it’s relevant for any bureaucracy!
The University Boat Race
Once upon a time, the University of KwaZulu-Natal and the University of Kyoto decided to have a boat race around Durban Bay. Both teams trained long and hard to reach their peak performance. On the Big Day the Japanese won by a mile.
Afterwards, the UKZN team became very discouraged by the loss and morale sagged. The university Executive decided that the reason for the crushing defeat had to be found and an inevitable committee was established to investigate the problem and recommend appropriate action.
Their conclusion:
The problem was that the Japanese team had eight people rowing and one person steering. The university team had one person rowing and eight people steering.
The university Executive immediately hired a firm of consultants to do a study of the team’s structure. Several hundreds of thousands of rands later they concluded that there were far too many people steering and not enough rowing.
To prevent losing to the Japanese the following year, the team structure was changed to 4 Deputy Vice Chancellors (Steering and Directional Services); 3 Vice Chancellors (Navigation and Planning) and one Assistant Senior Vice Chancellor in charge of the little satellite positioning thingy.
A performance appraisal system was set up for the person rowing the boat to give him more incentive to row harder and really become a key performer. “We must give him empowerment and enrichment” said one of the four Deputy Vice Chancellors (Steering and Directional Services). “That ought to do it”.
The next year, the Japanese won by TWO miles.
The university laid off the rower for poor performance, sold the paddles, cancelled all capital investment for new equipment and halted development of a new boat, awarded high performance bonuses to the consultants and used the money to appoint additional Vice Chancellors.